Class of 2009

On Friday night, Cheney Alan Scott walked across the platform and received his high school diploma. It was a big day and a wonderful day. Cheney, we are so proud of you!

Two Kids, 8 Wisdom Teeth and Lots of Ice

This past week has been all about wisdom teeth. Last Wednesday, Cheney had his four wisdom teeth taken out. Bethany followed him five days later and had hers removed yesterday. My couch has been full of one Hester or another with a bag of ice held to one side or the other of their face for almost a week now. I am so thankful that I have a flexible boss and can be home with the kids while they are recovering. Even though they are pretty grown up, I know they appreciate having me nearby to get them new ice or find them something to try to eat.

Happenings at the Hester House

Time is marching on awfully fast lately. In the last month, Cheney has been to South Africa and back, been to Orlando for his senior class trip, gone to his senior formal and Davin has completed three weeks of intensive physical therapy. All of the events were exciting in lots of different ways. Cheney's trip to South Africa seemed incredible. What an experience! He was able to share with some people, bond with a boy at an orphanage, and visit a gaming reservation. Davin's three weeks of PT was amazing! I keep waiting for him to stop progressing since he is older now. This time amazed me and amazed his therapists. It is hard to describe it to you because he did not start walking or talking or anything like that, but my boy was putting different things that he has learned to do over the years together. He was deciding to do things without being asked to do them I(and let's face it, sometimes begging...). Davin was keeping himself in a hands and knees position and then keeping his balance to stand up on his knees. Wow! Davin really didn't have balance just a few years ago. He is pretty awesome. I think Davin has a different work ethic now that he is older and that has helped him, too. We are no longer begging him with games, etc, but he is just doing what he needs to do. Cheney's formal was very exciting, too. Davin made the final decision concerning Cheney's tux and it was fun to help him get ready to go.

Okay, the big news coming up is that Cheney has decided where he is going to college!!!!!!!! I can not tell you what a struggle this has been. Should he go far, should he stay, and on and on. We were waiting on the financial info for one more school (his top choice) and when that finally came back after quite a bit of time, it seemed clear what God had for Cheney for the fall. The sad part is that in August, we will be driving our son to Illinois and dropping him off. He will be attending Wheaton College. The good news is that Bethany has moved back home and will be living here from now on since she will be doing her four day placement next semester and it is local. So, I am trading one for one!

The other big news in our house is that my Bethany is bringing home a boy for us to meet on Thursday night. Okay, I guess you have to call someone who is 25 a man:) Anyway, Bethany has not been one to date. She has always known what she is looking for and was pretty quick to rule a guy out. It seems that this guy is a bit different and it has been fun to hear her talk about him. Since she has never been boy-crazy as a teenager and has waited so patiently, we have never heard her talk about someone like this. Fun stuff. Of course, Alan is waiting to see what he thinks when he meets him. He also let Bethany know that if he doesn't approve, the deal is off. You have to love having a Dad who cares:)

As we go through all of these exciting things, I am reminded of two families who have had their lives turned upside down. I continue to pray for Brett and Paige and all they have before them.

Mom, can you?.......

My kids have often times called me and asked, "Mom, can you.....?". Lots of times it involved making some kind of food for something at school. Today Cheney called me after school and asked if I could make tacos for his Spanish IV class for tomorrow. My mind started running. Would chips and salsa be what he had in mind? I considered sending that with him and he wouldn't have complained, but instead thought through what I had in my house and came up with most of the fixings for chicken quesadillas. (Sorry, I am pretty sure I am spelling that wrong.) I had Cheney call a couple friends to see if they could fill in the empty spots for me. We got our part done and it's all packed up and ready to go for tomorrow.

Every time I do something for Cheney this year with school, I think about how his school years are almost over. I am so thankful for every time that my kids called and asked, "Mom, can you....?" I'm glad they knew I would do it. I'm glad they knew they could feel free to ask me. I will truly miss those phone calls or questions after school. Davin can not ask me and in his classrooms, there are usually so many adults, they do all of the stuff like that.

South Africa

Okay, I must have had something wrong when I typed the blog address last time. The team has arrived safe and sound and will keep us updated through the blog. Here is the address:) http://tkcssa09.blogspot.com Please let me know if that doesn't work. And, yes, Martha, wouldn't it be cool if Chey and Nate one day met up on the mission field?

This has been a super busy week with getting Cheney ready, having the Awana Grand Prix, having a Duffers for Davin meeting, and trying to get some work done, too. Now Bethany is home for Easter weekend and we are with just our blond kids. Since they are our pretty quiet ones, it is pretty quiet around here. The only time it gets kind of loud is when Bethany makes Davin mad and he screams at her. You all know Davin is non-verbal and he is pretty easy-going for the most part. However, lately, there are a couple of things that Bethany does, that make him scream and I mean SCREAM! The first thing is if she takes his yogurt. I will get out two yogurts for him and while I was feeding him his first one, Bethany wanted to take the other one and have some. Davin was not going for that. Bethany did not think he should be so greedy, but in all fairness, she had tacos and he knows he can not eat those. He only had those two yogurts. I might be a little stingy about that, too. Yesterday, Davin brought home a big bag of candy that his bus driver gave him. Well, Bethany decided to get into that just to get a reaction and it worked. Davin screamed again, although I don't think he was as angry as the whole yogurt thing. Besides, he can share his candy. Different thing altogether. It is funny to see him figure out new ways to get his point across and I think it's very smart of him.

What Have I Been Up To?

Cheney's senior year is flying by! Tomorrow morning he leaves with his choir for a competition in Washington, D.C. Then, on Wednesday, he heads to South Africa with a team from his school. They are going on a missions trip and I am so excited for him to have this opportunity. He will be gone until the 20th. Our house will be quiet, but my prayeris that Cheney's life will be forever changed by this trip. I think getting so far out of your comfort zone and putting your faith into practical practice can do a great work in your life. I am excited for him to go and excited for him to be able to come home and hear all that he has experienced. If you want to follow their trip, you can go to tkcssa.blogspot.com. Cheney worked hard on the website, so check it out.

I know the next few days will be busy as we prepare for him to leave. I see one more Target run in our future to get the few last items on our list. Then, the rest is out of my hands, but I guess it always was anyway.

Heavy Week

I have been so amazed by a couple of my friends particularly this week. I have watched two friends walk through trials that are beyond difficult..beyond painful...trials that there are not words to describe. Yet in the midst of these two trials, I have watched two women who love God cling to their Savior in the midst of the toughest of storms. I have been so ministered to by them in the midst of their trials. Amazing. They are amazing women, but I think they would both say that they serve an amazing God. He has given them strength that I just don't think is humanly possible. It has been my honor to pray for these two dear friends and their precious children.

"Empty Nest", he says....

Cheney and Alan are out in Wheaton, IL looking at Wheaton College. Cheney has ditched his Dad tonight to stay in one of the dorms. We both agree this is a good thing for Cheney and if Alan didn't feel good about it, he would not have left him there. So, Alan had dropped Cheney off and was driving back to the hotel alone and we were talking on the phone. Alan told me that dropping him off there is kind of the start of an empty nest for him. I asked why and he explained that Cheney going to college will really mark the end of part of our life. HELLO!!!!! Is that not what I had been saying and coming to terms with for the last several or many months???? What a funny guy he is. I guess he just needed to realize that on his own while spending the weekend with his boy who working towards being all the way grown. Big Sigh!!

God has given me such peace about Cheney and Alan doing this college visit together. I don't miss much in my kids' lives and when I do it is usually kicking and screaming. Now through in there that it is his birthday and I wondered how I was going to make it. But, God is good and this is the weekend it was supposed to be. God gave Alan and Cheney the chance to do this together and even set up all kinds of details that show we have a God who cares about the smallest details.

Happy Birthday Cheney Boy!

Today is Cheney Alan's 18th birthday! Wow, how in the world did we get all the way to here? Anyway, instead of him being home and us having a family dinner together, he and Alan are away in Wheaton, IL visiting Wheaton College. Selfishly, I would rather have him here with me. In the beginning stages of planning the trip, Davin and I were going along, too. As things worked out, just Alan and Cheney ended up going and will have a father-son weekend until Sunday. In spite of my selfishness, I can see that this is a great opportunity for the two of them to spend time together. Happy Birthday Cheney. I miss you and love you!

Cheney has grown so much and it truly is amazing to look way up into the eyes of this boy who once looked up into mine. I am really proud of the man that he has turned into. I don't think there was ever a time in Cheney's life where he was not happy and proud to be told how much like his Dad he was. I have always thought his Dad was a pretty good person for Cheney to want to be like. You all know I have gushed before over what an incredible brother Cheney is to Davin. They are so adorable to watch. I know that Cheney still has growing to do, as we all do. I can't wait to see what God has in store for him.

Cheney is on the left in the above photo. Standing next to him are two of Martha's boys - Josiah and Nathan. Aren't they adorable?

Talking and Listening

I love talking with my kids. They are pretty much adults now and our conversations are much different than they used to be. This past week has given us quite a few opportunities to talk about some really serious topics. It was so interesting to listen to their views and discuss things. Sometimes their views are not the same as mine, but I have really appreciated listening to how they came to their conclusions and where God has brought them. They are thinking, they are learning, they are growing. I sure do miss those early days of conversations, but I really am appreciating the conversations that we can share now.

So Blessed

I was fixing (that is from you, Tina) to write a comment on my last post, but realized I would rather write another entry instead.

Thank you to my friends who commented already on my last post. For all of Davin's life, I have realized that I am being watched. Not by the CIA, well, at least I hope not. But, by other people. All the time. I bet Sherri can relate to this. I bet Kelli can relate, too. We have children who are different. People can tell they are different by looking at them and so they watch us. They may not know someone with a serious disability and the way they learn about them is by watching me in the grocery store with my son. They watch me talk to him. They watch me pull his wheelchair from the side, so I am not walking behind him, but beside him. They watch how I explain things to him, although they may not think he can understand. I am constantly aware that I am an advocate for people with disabilities even though I have never signed up to be.

With each of my children came different challenges and I was ready and prepared to meet each one of them. My challenges with Davin are a bit different. That involves responding to people's looks and questions. I don't always like this part of my job, but it is part of my job. Like it or not. My hope is that when people watch me or one of my family members with Davin, they don't see a lack of anything. They see an abundance of many things. They don't see a chair. They see a boy. They see a huge personality and someone who likes to get into some trouble;)

That is why yesterday's post was so difficult for me. I don't always want people to see the harder side of my life. I don't want anyone to think that having Davin was less of a thrill than having their child who is "normal". (I REALLY hate that wording) I want them to know that Davin has so much to offer and that it is my privilege to care for him. I guess with Davin, I have to work a bit harder to have people see that sometimes, so I try not to complain and talk about the bad side as much.

However, there are hard things about having a child who is non-ambulatory. I don't like to admit it, but it is true. Maybe it is good to talk about it sometimes, especially with the people in my life that already see Davin for who he is. I didn't have to convince any of you:)

Hard Times

There are times in a person's life where things go smoothly. There are also times in a person's life when things just seem hard. I am in a bit of a hard time right now. Maybe that explains my "lack of blogging" lately. Just not too much to share and yet lots and lots to think about. I have a couple of close friends going through some very difficult things. My heart is very heavy for them and God brings them to my mind often so I can pray for them. One of those situations also affects my family and that has weighed heavy on all of us.

I am also feeling a physical burden that I have never faced before. Well, maybe I have, but was slow to admit it. You all know that I am the caretaker (and quite glad to be) of my 16 year-old son Davin. He has brought my life so much joy in these last 16 years, I can not even explain it. Many of you know him and you know that he is a special boy (almost man, I guess?). For all of these years, I have been able to take Davin wherever I went. If I needed milk and bread, I just plopped him in the carseat and went to the store. I whipped the wheelchair out of the car and off we went. Davin went everywhere. I was very capable of giving him his baths and taking total care of him. I like being self-sufficient and I have always liked it this way.

Well, Davin doesn't weigh 20 pounds anymore (thankfully) and his wheelchair is so heavy that every time I put it in the back of my Jeep, I am amazed that it got in there. I am choosing (I can hardly even believe it myself) to not take Davin anywhere I don't need him to go to. Even as I write this, tears come to my eyes. At the end of the day, my body aches. I pick Davin up to put him in his chair, I carry him to his bed, I carry him out to the car....I get tired. I know that Davin has grown a lot in the last couple of years and that has made it difficult for my body to keep up with his growing one. I will catch up once he is not growing as much and I will get used to the weight again, but things won't be the same.

I made a choice when Davin was diagnosed. I chose for his life to be regular. I chose for our family to be regular. I think we have done a good job at that. Most people might not even know that I am struggling. I want Davin to go to the store and everywhere that he wants to go. (He LOVES to go with us everywhere!) I have also made the choice that God gave Davin to me and Alan to care for. We will keep him at our home for the rest of our lives. I know that is not everyone's decision, but it is mine. So, I need to adjust some things. I need to make my body last so that I can take the best care of Davin possible.

This does not overwhelm me everyday, but some days it does. One thing that is changing for us is that Cheney is going to college next year. I can not tell you how much of a help my older kids are to their youngest brother. Not because I ask them, but because they love him and they want him to be with them, too. Next year, I will bear the responsibility of Davin's physical needs alone for the most part. Alan will be here, but he has a pretty demanding job now and is not home until later in the evenings.

I know that this is a difficult transition. I will catch up to Davin's new size and weight. God will continue to sustain me and to sustain Davin even when the other kids are not here to help.

A Nice Day

Today our senior high youth group had a service project and a Christmas party. We had to be to church by 8am and I was NOT happy about that this morning. I was whining and complaining the whole time I was getting ready. It turned out to be a great day, though. During the school year, I don't work with the teens on Wednesday night youth group. I work with the Awana Sparkies. (which you all know I love) Sometimes I forget how much I enjoy being with the teens. I go to Sunday School with them and activities, but the activities are the times where I really get to connect with the kids and get to know them better. They are an encouragement to me. Today we went to help out with an inner city program that reaches out to a very difficult area. I believe that this city is rated one of the worst in the country. The kids were adorable and the gospel was shared. It was so interesting to listen to and see the way that they ran the program. I was blessed by going and hope that we will be able to continue helping this ministry out in the future. Cheney left feeling that the ministry was a very worthwhile thing and I really appreciate my sons being able to participate in something like that. All in all, it was a great day, even if I did have to get up early on a Saturday morning.

Thank You Lord

Last Wednesday, we were all getting ready to go to Awana. It was a big night for Ashleigh and Bethany. The T&T club was going to a nursing home. We had never done a trip like that with the clubbers before. Bethany, and her two friends, Rachael and Kelly, headed out to get there early as the T&Ters were leaving early. I got my things together and the rest of us prepared to leave. As I was heading out the door to begin loading up my Jeep, I got a call from Bethany. She had been in an accident. They were all okay, although she thought both cars were totaled, but the other man was trapped in his car. That's all I knew. I told her I would be right there and Alan and I decided that we would head over to the accident to be with the girls and Cheney would drive himself, his brother and a friend to church. As we were leaving, I handed Cheney my story for Sparks and explained really quickly what he would need to do to run my club.

We headed out and soon came upon the accident scene. There were firetrucks, ambulances, and police cars. Bethany's car was facing the opposite direction and parked on the other side of the road from the car that hit her. After being directed across the street by a fireman (and being told repeatedly by my husband that I needed to "calm down") we found that the girls were all sitting inside one of the ambulances. The older man was still stuck in his car. Much to my pleasant surprise, the ambulance door opened and I saw our friend who happens to be a state trooper sitting with the girls taking their statements. What an extra blessing for some girls who were pretty shaken up to see a friendly face.

We decided that we would take the girls to the hospital to make sure they were okay. Bethany was holding her arm funny and we thought it could be broken. The other girls were stiff and sore and Rachael might have hit her head. The emergency room was a mixture of concern, relief, more relief and a fuller realization of what the girls had been through.

The girls had been stopped in traffic waiting to go through a circle (it's this weird thing that they have in NJ). Without any warning to them, a car slammed into the back of them. We don't have the police report, yet, but the girls do not feel like the man was braking and we know the speed limit there is 50 mph. Somehow Bethany's car did not hit a car in front of her, but flew into the other lane of traffic and at one point was nearly on its side. Bethany tried to control the car with all her might and was able to make some quick decisions as far as hitting a telephone pole v. running over a mailbox and stop sign. There was one point where they were sure their lives were over. They were once again in the other lane of traffic and a car was coming right for Bethany's side of the car. Somehow the car managed to stop before hitting them.

All in all, we had some really sore girls (no broken arm) that we had to send back to PBU to complete their week of finals. However, I will take that any day over what could have happened. God was so gracious to us and kept our girls with us. God blessed me to be able to get the call from Bethany herself so I would know she was okay. He had our state trooper friend on duty and on the scene. God kept other people from being hit and gave Bethany the presence of mind to think things through in a very stressful situation.

It was also a blessing to see all of my kids jump in to help each other out. Cheney taught my story, ran game time at Awana for my club and did it beautifully. Ashleigh and Kevin came home with Cheney and Davin which let Cheney not be in charge anymore and be able to relax a bit. Two other friends of Bethany's waited until we got home from the hospital and took her back to school. We were able to finish the night by praying together and thanking God for the incredible mercy He showed to us on that night.

Thank you, Father. We never know what a day will bring. Thank you for your protection that you granted to all who were on the road that night.

Tagged, but this time not embarrassed...

I was tagged by my friend Kelli. Thank you Kelli!

8 Shows I Watch:

(I really don't watch much t.v., mostly DVDs, so I will try:)
1. The Office
2. Gilmore Girls
3. Jon & Kate Plus 8 (If Alan is not home:)
4. The Amazing Race
5. Little People, Big World
6. Good Morning America (I left The Today Show after they were so offensive a few months ago)
7. That's all I can think of.

8 Things I Did Yesterday:

1. laundry
2. kept Davin home from school since he was still sick
3. did nebulizer treatments for Davin
4. took the dogs out
5. made a blueberry pie for Alan to take to work
6. ate pizza with my extended family for official "pizza night"
7. talked to my long lost friend on the phone
8. worked at Three Nails Construction

8 Places I Like to Eat:

1. Bertuccis
2. Five Guys Burgers and Fries
3. Panera Bread
4. Friendlys
5. Outback Steakhouse
6. Pirones
7. TGI Fridays
8. Fuddruckers

8 Things I Look Forward To:

1. All my kids being together
2. Adding to our family hopefully someday
3. Having an addition put on our house
4. Heaven (Davin will be able to walk all by himself!)
5. Vacation
6. Awana
7. Evenings with Alan
8. Seeing my children serve the Lord

8 Things on My Wish List:

1. A kidney for Kyler
2. Davin to swallow all the time
3. A wheelchair van (I think, although I am really dragging my feet, so am I really ready???)
4. Dinners where I only feed myself:)
5. Hardwood floors
6. Countertops
7. Three Nails to thrive
8. Davin to read (and us to know that he reads;)

I won't tag anyone else, but this was a fun list, so maybe you should try it.

For a Season

Our family has moved many, many times over the years. I believe we are living in our 14th location presently. Some were local moves, but many of them were not. At each stop of our lives, God has blessed me with some amazing friends. It has been sad to leave each place, but I could always look back and see how God provided just what I needed for that time in my life. Just yesterday, I reconnected with my very best friend of my late teens and early twenties. We met when our husbands were both in the Navy and we were living in Navy housing in Saratoga Springs. We each had one very young child and I was pregnant with my second. One day we sat on the playground and watched our children play. I told her of my "plan" for having children. I was going to have four. I would have my third when Ashleigh went to kindergarten and my fourth when the new baby went to kindergarten. She said she hadn't thought about it, but thought that sounded like a good plan. We both did just that. It was so much fun to talk to her on the phone and catch up with our now grown and nearly grown children. God had us to be friends at a time when we were without our husbands a great deal of time. We relied so much on each other and we also grew so much in our faith with our Savior at that time. When we moved to different locations, we parted with many tears and much sadness. Through the years we had kept in touch here and there, but just recently reconnected and what a pleasant surprise. God really does provide just the friend that I need, just when I need them. We are at such similar stages in life and have so much to share.

So Much to Think About

Yesterday my husband and my boys and I were blessed to be able to go to Washington D.C.'s Holocaust Museum. What a journey it takes you on. Two of my children have researched this subject extensively in school, but I do not remember learning much about it while I was in school. While my children were learning about it, they shared a lot of things with me, though.

It really made me think about a lot of things. Adolf Hitler never pretended to be someone he was not. From the very beginning, he told everyone what he stood for and what his intentions were. He was clear as could be. His reign did not happen over night. It was gradual and the whole world watched it happen.

I looked at so many pictures of people. People who were certainly just like me and just like you. They had hopes and dreams for their families. They had so much to offer the world. Where in the world did anyone get the idea that they did not deserve to live and were less worthy than someone else. They often times didn't know what they were about to face. I read about the different policy changes that went into effect. Little by little, rights were taken away from entire groups of people. There are so many sad aspects to this that it is hard to wrap my head around it. It certainly gives me much to think about. I don't want to forget what I learned and what I saw.

This Birthday Boy

Happy 16th birthday, Davin Boy! I can not even believe it has been sixteen years since you entered my world!!

I was going to share some of my story of Davin's life and the struggles we have gone through together, but I think that is better left for another day. Today is his big 16th birthday and I am celebrating Davin today!!! I will share 16 things about Davin.

1. Davin has very flirty blue eyes.(He knows how to use them. I can remember when he was as young as 7 months old and he was batting his eyes at someone:)

2. Davin is the baby in our family and we do not let him forget that. Okay, well, I don't, anyway.

3. Davin has a wheelchair that is black and has sparkles in the paint.

4. Davin is in grade 9-2. He gets to stay in each high school grade for two years if we want him to. I don't see any reason not to.

5. Davin has a great sense of humor.

6. Davin sleeps with our puppy Rocky every night. Rocky sleeps right on his legs, but it doesn't seem to bother him.

7. When Davin was born, they immediately said that he looked just like his Daddy.

8. Davin adores his Daddy and his brother Cheney and wants to be just like them.

9. He also adores his sisters Ashleigh and Bethany and they have always taken excellent care of him.

10. He has a one-on-one aide at school and I have always thought he feels badly for the kids who don't have one. Maybe they are just not special enough or cute enough???? (I think that is what he may be thinking)

11. Davin has been flipped upside down in his wheelchair at least three times. Once on a playground, once in a ditch and once on the Awana circle.

12. He models patience for me constantly.

13. Davin is very social and loves to be around the action. You can not do anything without him knowing it, because he is always watching.

14. Davin LOVES to eat and he really LOVES to eat sweets!

15. Davin rides a yellow bus to school and he much prefers that over his mother taking him.

16. I am not sure what my life would look like without this boy. He has changed who I am in so many ways and I have learned so much from growing with him.

It's going to be a great day!

Cheney had some to add even though it makes more than 16:)

17. Davin LOVES to be naked. He also likes me to make a big deal about how he is naked and I don't want any naked boys in my living room.

18. Every day is his birthday. Whenever anyone is singing happy birthday, Davin is grinning from ear to ear like it is for him.

19. Most every day is the "best day of Davin's life" AGAIN!!

Good job, Cheney. You know your brother well.

Singing and Dancing

Today I was blessed to have both of my girls at home for the whole afternoon. We had such a good time together and Davin certainly found it much more entertaining than when it is just the two of us after school. We played lots and lots of music that we had listened to so many times while the girls were growing up and of course, we had to do some "living room dancing". That was a favorite past time for many years and still is. I really have some great moves:)

Tagged

I was tagged, but not in the normal "blogging" sense of the word. You see, the other day, my sister and I made plans to meet for lunch. I put on a new outfit and was feeling pretty good. I headed into work to get a few things done before going to meet her. I walked into the restaurant and sat at a table and waited for my sister. We had a very nice lunch and then headed out to our cars. It was at that point, that my sister (so lovingly and with hardly any laughing at all) took two HUGE stickers off of the back of my new pants. Of course, I really just wanted everyone to know I had on a new pair of pants AND what size they were:) My sister could barely keep herself together, she was laughing so hard. I realized I would never again be able to eat there and it also explained why the man in the restaurant had been staring at me. So, off I went to the grocery store to pick up a couple things I needed. I picked my purse up when I got to the register (realizing that no one in the store had seen my earlier spectacle) and saw that the two huge stickers were stuck to the outside of my purse that I had been carrying around on my shoulder. Naturally, I hurried to my car and called my sister to tell her this news that would give her an even bigger boost to her day and make her feel pretty good about how she was doing today:)