I learned on Friday (when we filed the official paperwork for Davin's guardianship....hopefully;-) that in our county, we may not have to make a court appearance. The court may grant the order on paper and that may be it!! I think that would be a lot less traumatic if I didn't have to hear all of those words. I know I would rather Davin not to have to hear those words.
Also, because we were not able to file the complaint with the court until 2 weeks before Davin's birthday, there may be some things we need to do prior to his birthday to cover our decision making abilities until the order for guardianship can be granted.
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Leaf Fun?
I had in my mind that I Davin really NEEDED to play in a leaf pile this year. I am not a big fan of raking (okay, I rarely ever rake up my leaves), so he had not played in the leaves for a long time. It was on my list of things to do for today:-) I began raking while Davin watched (after we paid our last respects to a bird that died flying into one of our windows:-( and the look on his face said, "Mom, this is lame". It really did! So, I am talking away and telling him that this is FUN, not LAME!
He was unsure when I went to plunk him into the leaf pile, but he enjoyed it. He enjoyed it until the part where Bethany covered him all up except for his face. He didn't love that. Good to know;-)
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
I Could Be In Trouble
Alan and Bethany are both away. I am quite used to Alan being away, but he usually left me with a house full of noise and kids and busyness. This time, it is me and Davin and our dogs. It is quiet as can be and we don't like that so much.
With everyone else being gone, it is kind of nice to have Davin with me at night. I know I am probably getting myself into trouble. Davin especially loves it because he sleeps right in his Dad's spot on his Dad's pillows:-) He also likes it when I tell his Dad that he is sleeping in his spot. Alan reminded me I am probably making things harder for myself in the long run. But, he just looks so cute and sweet sleeping there and he sleeps SO good (amazingly enough) when he is in our bed.
I think I am in trouble and I will have no one else to blame but myself.
With everyone else being gone, it is kind of nice to have Davin with me at night. I know I am probably getting myself into trouble. Davin especially loves it because he sleeps right in his Dad's spot on his Dad's pillows:-) He also likes it when I tell his Dad that he is sleeping in his spot. Alan reminded me I am probably making things harder for myself in the long run. But, he just looks so cute and sweet sleeping there and he sleeps SO good (amazingly enough) when he is in our bed.
I think I am in trouble and I will have no one else to blame but myself.
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
God's Grace Was There
First, I must clarify. There form yesterday said, "incapacitated individual", not "incompetent". Sorry about that.
Davin and I are back from our appointments. Davin saw two doctors today. One is our pediatrician and one is a senior doctor at the practice. I had myself prepared to say something to the doctors if they began saying things that were going to hurt Davin. I envisioned whether I would need to have Davin leave the room and wait for me in the waiting room.
Our doctor could not have been more compassionate. He did not say a lot about what a devastating thing this was for us, but you could see it in his face and in the things he did say and didn't say. He already knows Davin, so there was not much to talk about. We did talk about how the paragraph that I had written did not really define who Davin is. The doctor agreed with me that in this case, we needed to make him sound as bad as possible, but that Davin is the boy we know, not what is on that paper. He signed the forms for us and we were ready for the other doctor.
The next doctor we have maybe met one other time. He could not have been more caring and considerate in the way he dealt with us. I had been praying that God would let me "keep it together". Since I am not a regular crier;-), when I do cry, it tends to be something rather ugly where my words can not even be understood. I wanted to be in control and I did not want Davin to feel like this was a huge deal. The doctor never said a word that would make Davin feel badly. He asked what he could do to help us beside signing the form. He asked some questions about where Davin goes to school and how he communicates.
We left without one tear falling! God's grace is ALWAYS sufficient. The same will be true for our court date.
Davin and I talked this morning about the purpose for the appointments today and the upcoming court date. I told him that when people turn 18, they are supposed to make all of their decisions by themselves, but sometimes people need a little help. We are asking the court to let Davin have a little help in making decisions. No biggie. It is okay to need some help.
Davin and I are back from our appointments. Davin saw two doctors today. One is our pediatrician and one is a senior doctor at the practice. I had myself prepared to say something to the doctors if they began saying things that were going to hurt Davin. I envisioned whether I would need to have Davin leave the room and wait for me in the waiting room.
Our doctor could not have been more compassionate. He did not say a lot about what a devastating thing this was for us, but you could see it in his face and in the things he did say and didn't say. He already knows Davin, so there was not much to talk about. We did talk about how the paragraph that I had written did not really define who Davin is. The doctor agreed with me that in this case, we needed to make him sound as bad as possible, but that Davin is the boy we know, not what is on that paper. He signed the forms for us and we were ready for the other doctor.
The next doctor we have maybe met one other time. He could not have been more caring and considerate in the way he dealt with us. I had been praying that God would let me "keep it together". Since I am not a regular crier;-), when I do cry, it tends to be something rather ugly where my words can not even be understood. I wanted to be in control and I did not want Davin to feel like this was a huge deal. The doctor never said a word that would make Davin feel badly. He asked what he could do to help us beside signing the form. He asked some questions about where Davin goes to school and how he communicates.
We left without one tear falling! God's grace is ALWAYS sufficient. The same will be true for our court date.
Davin and I talked this morning about the purpose for the appointments today and the upcoming court date. I told him that when people turn 18, they are supposed to make all of their decisions by themselves, but sometimes people need a little help. We are asking the court to let Davin have a little help in making decisions. No biggie. It is okay to need some help.
Monday, October 18, 2010
Words
Today I had to type some words at work that I did not necessarily like or agree with. The worst part is that they were about my own son. My brother-in-law/boss/attorney is getting ready to file the necessary paperwork for Alan and I to become Davin's legal guardian once he turns 18. (Otherwise, the state could step in and make decisions in his interest.) Davin will be 18 next month, so it needs to be done. The first step is to have our pediatrician sign a physician's affidavit. That is what I typed up today. Tomorrow Davin will go to the doctor. He will see his primary doctor and also one of the other doctors in the practice. It will last about an hour.
Today, I typed the words..."Davin Hester, an alleged incompetent individual". I didn't like those words. I also didn't like the words that I had to type describing what Davin can't do. I have always hated describing him that way. Can't we just talk about what he can do and what he is like? No, not for this. We just stick to the big facts. He is non-ambulatory, non-verbal, can not feed himself, wheelchair-bound and requires 24 hour a day care and his parents to make decisions for him. Does this sound like Davin to you? It doesn't sound like him to me, either. You know that Davin has his own ideas and likes to make the decisions around here:-) However, I understand the point and I realize we need to stick to the facts. I kept wanting to add things like...but he shows us clearly what he wants to do by finger pointing and eye gazing, but to write those things was not appropriate in this situation.
So, tomorrow I will take my son to the pediatrician, but it will not be a normal appointment. I am trusting that there will not be a whole lot said that will make Davin feel badly about himself. I will talk to Davin about what is going to happen (as I have been) in the morning and prepare him for what is ahead. Who will prepare me? This is hard.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Sometimes I Am A Little Slow
Poor Davin. Maybe this is a reminder to slow down and take the time to figure out what Davin is saying to me. But, it is the morning and I am so busy. Our morning routine is planned out to the minute. No time at all for anything out of the ordinary. I get his first medicine, get his clothes, shoes and boots together, get breakfast ready, move the wheelchair where I need it at the end of the hallway, get Davin dressed, feed him and put his coat on. Done. Not a minute to spare.
Davin has been pointing at something in his closet from time to time for a VERY long time. A couple of times, I thought I knew what he wanted and got that out for later in the day. Several times, I was pretty sure he wanted to wear something specific (maybe after almost 18 years, he is tired of me picking out his clothes???), but after trying to find out what he wanted to wear, I quickly gave up because, did I mention that we have a very tight schedule in the mornings???
Today Alan and I went to a wedding and Bethany and Davin stayed home together. (We try to avoid the whole "babysitting" reference so we don't offend the boy with the razor stubble;-) When we came home, Davin had on a camouflage long sleeve Army fatigue shirt. The real kind like his Uncle Mike wears when he goes to the reserves. We had gotten it for Cheney when he was in a play in the fourth grade, I think. Apparently, when Bethany was getting Davin dressed, he was insistent that he needed something else. She tried and tried to figure out what it was and then she found it..... the shirt.... who knew?
She said that she picked the Army shirt up and Davin was beside himself. When we came home hours and hours later, he was proud as a peacock and just laughed and smiled as we talked about the shirt. Davin even laughed and laughed when I told him that I didn't know that was the shirt he had been wanting to wear for so long. Oye!
When Alan went to get Davin ready for his bath, he nearly had to cut the shirt off of him because it is very much on the small side:-) So, we will be on the hunt for some new fatigues for Davin since he obviously is very set on wearing them. Fortunately for Davin, he has an Uncle Mike who can probably hook him up with some.
Davin has been pointing at something in his closet from time to time for a VERY long time. A couple of times, I thought I knew what he wanted and got that out for later in the day. Several times, I was pretty sure he wanted to wear something specific (maybe after almost 18 years, he is tired of me picking out his clothes???), but after trying to find out what he wanted to wear, I quickly gave up because, did I mention that we have a very tight schedule in the mornings???
Today Alan and I went to a wedding and Bethany and Davin stayed home together. (We try to avoid the whole "babysitting" reference so we don't offend the boy with the razor stubble;-) When we came home, Davin had on a camouflage long sleeve Army fatigue shirt. The real kind like his Uncle Mike wears when he goes to the reserves. We had gotten it for Cheney when he was in a play in the fourth grade, I think. Apparently, when Bethany was getting Davin dressed, he was insistent that he needed something else. She tried and tried to figure out what it was and then she found it..... the shirt.... who knew?
She said that she picked the Army shirt up and Davin was beside himself. When we came home hours and hours later, he was proud as a peacock and just laughed and smiled as we talked about the shirt. Davin even laughed and laughed when I told him that I didn't know that was the shirt he had been wanting to wear for so long. Oye!
When Alan went to get Davin ready for his bath, he nearly had to cut the shirt off of him because it is very much on the small side:-) So, we will be on the hunt for some new fatigues for Davin since he obviously is very set on wearing them. Fortunately for Davin, he has an Uncle Mike who can probably hook him up with some.
Saturday, October 09, 2010
A Good Thing
I do not love the fact that Davin has a severe disability. I DO love the fact that at almost 18 years-old, he will still snuggle with his Mom:-) Priceless. Love that boy.
Saturday, October 02, 2010
The Correct Attire
About four months ago, my family got a gym membership. Two of my kids started going. They kept asking me and asking me when I was going to start going. I don't want you to think my kids were trying to be mean to me. They knew I had wanted to start going to the gym, but the summer was just not a good time for me to start that. When Davin started back to school a few weeks ago, I started at the gym. I have this adorable partner that goes with me. She is a blondie and rather tall;-) My goal is to go three times a week, but so far, I have only made it two times a week.
I do realize that I do not always look confident when I am doing something new. Sometimes I am laughing at the gym. No one else seems to be having fun. It is a pretty serious place. I always have to read the directions when I go to a new piece of equipment. I do try to read them quickly, though;-) I also realize I do not look like the rest of the people who are working out. Do any of the other people have the upper part of their body thrown over the top of the machine like they are hanging on for dear life? Not really. Do I notice anyone else's head bobbing wildly while they are working out? No. Do other people look like they are going to fall off of the stair climber thing? No. Thankfully the nice man who happened to be smiling when he walked by and looked at me, also got on one down the aisle and then I was able to see how I was supposed to be using it;-)
Hey, I am a beginner. The last time I worked out in a gym was in high school for softball. That has been a while. Give me time.
Today I was talking to Cheney about the gym. He is very proud of me that I have been going and we talked about how he will go with me when he comes home for Thanksgiving. I then told him how someone had asked me a question about his college when they saw me wearing my matching Wheaton College sweatpants and t-shirt. (and frankly I was feeling good!) Cheney asked me why in the world I would be wearing sweats to the gym??? I had no idea why I should not be wearing sweats. Sure, I have not seen a lot of people at the gym wearing sweats, but in 1984, we wore sweats when we worked out. I asked Chey what I was supposed to be wearing at the gym and he informed me (please everyone take note, lest you make a similar mistake) that most people wear some sort of "athletic shorts" to the gym. Well, who knew??
Tonight I emailed Cheney to let him know that my sweats are all washed and ready for me to wear them to the gym on Monday! I can't wait until he gets to go with me. I am really hoping he brings me home a Wheaton headband that I can wear to match:-)
I do realize that I do not always look confident when I am doing something new. Sometimes I am laughing at the gym. No one else seems to be having fun. It is a pretty serious place. I always have to read the directions when I go to a new piece of equipment. I do try to read them quickly, though;-) I also realize I do not look like the rest of the people who are working out. Do any of the other people have the upper part of their body thrown over the top of the machine like they are hanging on for dear life? Not really. Do I notice anyone else's head bobbing wildly while they are working out? No. Do other people look like they are going to fall off of the stair climber thing? No. Thankfully the nice man who happened to be smiling when he walked by and looked at me, also got on one down the aisle and then I was able to see how I was supposed to be using it;-)
Hey, I am a beginner. The last time I worked out in a gym was in high school for softball. That has been a while. Give me time.
Today I was talking to Cheney about the gym. He is very proud of me that I have been going and we talked about how he will go with me when he comes home for Thanksgiving. I then told him how someone had asked me a question about his college when they saw me wearing my matching Wheaton College sweatpants and t-shirt. (and frankly I was feeling good!) Cheney asked me why in the world I would be wearing sweats to the gym??? I had no idea why I should not be wearing sweats. Sure, I have not seen a lot of people at the gym wearing sweats, but in 1984, we wore sweats when we worked out. I asked Chey what I was supposed to be wearing at the gym and he informed me (please everyone take note, lest you make a similar mistake) that most people wear some sort of "athletic shorts" to the gym. Well, who knew??
Tonight I emailed Cheney to let him know that my sweats are all washed and ready for me to wear them to the gym on Monday! I can't wait until he gets to go with me. I am really hoping he brings me home a Wheaton headband that I can wear to match:-)
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Waiting...
Every afternoon around 2:00, there is one little dog in our house who watches out the window for Davin Boy. He waits and waits and waits until it is 2:30 and Davin's bus backs into the driveway. Usually Davin is greeted by Rocky who then has to sniff his wheelchair and figure out where Davin has been and what kind of smells he has on him today. Cute:-)
Friday, September 24, 2010
The Year was 1990
I have now been a parent for 25 years! It is hard for me to believe that. To make things worse, my BABY is turning 18 in just a couple of months!! Next time someone asks me my children's ages, I am going to include my dogs' ages because that will make me feel better. Having children who are 18 - 25 is not good! They are way too old:-) They are still fun, though and I do like to be around them. Still, I think using the dogs' ages is a good idea.
Of the 25 years of parenting, I have been changing diapers for 24 of them. It has been part of my life for over half of my life! Wow! HOWEVER....there was that one year....it was blissful....there were no diapers...
When Bethany was 2 1/2, this cute little 4 year-old named Ashleigh potty trained her. I am not even kidding a little bit. I would always say that Bethany was fine, but Ashleigh would drag (sometimes literally) her into the bathroom and insist that she "wanted" to go to the bathroom. Since Bethany has always adored her older sister, I guess she decided if Ashleigh thought she wanted to go to the bathroom, then she must have. So, Bethany was potty trained. I was not yet pregnant with Cheney Boy. Alan was home from his med-cruise just recently. Life was pretty good:-) I knew it, too. Sometimes when people have small children, they think life is so crazy and hectic and can't wait for them to grow up. Not me. I knew having two little girls was the best and having no diapers made my life just seem like a breeze.
It was a whole year until our little Cheney Alan Scott came into our lives in January of 1991. Even though changing diapers is no big deal and it is just a part of my life, sometimes, I still think back to 1990.....ahhhhhhh.....:-)
Of the 25 years of parenting, I have been changing diapers for 24 of them. It has been part of my life for over half of my life! Wow! HOWEVER....there was that one year....it was blissful....there were no diapers...
When Bethany was 2 1/2, this cute little 4 year-old named Ashleigh potty trained her. I am not even kidding a little bit. I would always say that Bethany was fine, but Ashleigh would drag (sometimes literally) her into the bathroom and insist that she "wanted" to go to the bathroom. Since Bethany has always adored her older sister, I guess she decided if Ashleigh thought she wanted to go to the bathroom, then she must have. So, Bethany was potty trained. I was not yet pregnant with Cheney Boy. Alan was home from his med-cruise just recently. Life was pretty good:-) I knew it, too. Sometimes when people have small children, they think life is so crazy and hectic and can't wait for them to grow up. Not me. I knew having two little girls was the best and having no diapers made my life just seem like a breeze.
It was a whole year until our little Cheney Alan Scott came into our lives in January of 1991. Even though changing diapers is no big deal and it is just a part of my life, sometimes, I still think back to 1990.....ahhhhhhh.....:-)
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Happy 25th Birthday
25 years ago, my life changed forever. A little 8 pound, 5 ounce little girl came into my life and I was no longer strictly known as Heather. I was Ashleigh's Mom. It is a title that I have had for 25 years now and am so proud of. Happy Birthday to the baby girl who changed my life, stole my heart (and her Daddy's) and set my course on a different direction. I love you!!
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
25 Years Ago Today....
25 years ago today I was waiting and waiting and waiting. I had been given a due date of September 6th and here it was the 14th. 25 years ago, I was about as big as a house;-) Seriously. 25 years ago, I had a husband, but we didn't yet feel like a real family. We had been married such a short amount of time (6 months) and over half of that we had spent apart while Alan attended Navy boot camp and his first ET school. 25 years ago, I was writing letters almost every day telling Alan what was going on in the day. We got to talk on the phone some, but it was not like today where we have email and communication is so much easier. Phone calls were expensive and money was not something we had a lot of:-)
25 years ago, my whole life was about to change. I had been through the most terrible time of my young life. I had felt the stares of people in my church, heard the whispers, missed the eye contact, saw the disappointment in faces.
But now....now it was different. Now my baby was about to be born. The baby God had decided to bless me with in spite of who I was and what I had done. I was ready. I don't know how I was ready, but I was.
I made a decision to never make my baby pay for my mistakes. I took that to heart. I would welcome this baby and never look back.
When I think about that time in my life, the most amazing thing is the transition. When did my teenage heart become a mother's heart? I can not look back and see the day, but it is so obvious that it happened. I went from being a senior in high school concerned with soccer practice and homework and now 9 months later, I was ready for this new challenge. I didn't feel like I was missing out.
Thankfully, this day 25 years ago, I didn't realize I had another 9 days to wait!!!! She was worth it, though.
25 years ago, my whole life was about to change. I had been through the most terrible time of my young life. I had felt the stares of people in my church, heard the whispers, missed the eye contact, saw the disappointment in faces.
But now....now it was different. Now my baby was about to be born. The baby God had decided to bless me with in spite of who I was and what I had done. I was ready. I don't know how I was ready, but I was.
I made a decision to never make my baby pay for my mistakes. I took that to heart. I would welcome this baby and never look back.
When I think about that time in my life, the most amazing thing is the transition. When did my teenage heart become a mother's heart? I can not look back and see the day, but it is so obvious that it happened. I went from being a senior in high school concerned with soccer practice and homework and now 9 months later, I was ready for this new challenge. I didn't feel like I was missing out.
Thankfully, this day 25 years ago, I didn't realize I had another 9 days to wait!!!! She was worth it, though.
Monday, September 13, 2010
Be Specific
Davin came home from school today with a bit of an attitude problem. His note from school said he had a great day, but when he got home, his sister was on his sofa that he usually rests on. I was asking Davin questions, but instead of giving me a yes or a no, he decided to start hitting his sister. I firmly explained he would not be hitting his sister or he would have to go spend time in his room. I guess I needed to give the full list of things he was not to do since he then pulled Bethany's hair instead. Ugh! Really Davin? I told him he was going to have to adjust his attitude and give his sister a hug as an apology. It took a while, but he eventually submitted. Attitude, attitude, it's all about the attitude.
Friday, September 10, 2010
I Got It Right Today
The reason that Davin was in his bed crying (my previous post) was because he had a fever:-( I felt pretty badly that I let him cry and cry for so long. Needless to say, it was a long, rough night. Sleep did not come easily for him and his fever was not quick to break. After several hours, I took it to the Lord and prayed over Davin and his fever finally broke and he was able to rest.
On Thursday, Davin was feeling much better and we got up and got ready for school. His bag was packed, breakfast was eaten, straps were done on his chair. He was ready. The bus did not come. We watched out the window. Rocky watched out the window. The bus still didn't come. I called the bus garage. This year, Davin's school decided to observe the Jewish holiday. The bus would not be coming. Oh yikes. Just a couple of days into school and already I am confused! This is not a good sign;-)
Today, we got up and got ready. The bus came. Good day.
On Thursday, Davin was feeling much better and we got up and got ready for school. His bag was packed, breakfast was eaten, straps were done on his chair. He was ready. The bus did not come. We watched out the window. Rocky watched out the window. The bus still didn't come. I called the bus garage. This year, Davin's school decided to observe the Jewish holiday. The bus would not be coming. Oh yikes. Just a couple of days into school and already I am confused! This is not a good sign;-)
Today, we got up and got ready. The bus came. Good day.
Tuesday, September 07, 2010
Giving In
Alan left today for Rochester for the week. Bethany is spending the night with her sister. I have one little 17-year-old boy who is whining in his bed. I am ready to call it quits and go and get him, put him in my bed and he will be asleep in no time. Little twirp:-)
Today was Davin's first day of school (the second for everyone else;-) and the day went well. For dinner, I took Davin and Bethany to Friendly's to celebrate the first day of school. Davin had a HUGE strawberry milkshake (thanks to his bus driver Leslie who gave him the Friendly's gift card) for dinner. We stopped by Costco and Joann Fabric on the way home. I even made up a special first day of school song and sang it to Davin on the way home. You would think he would be tired and want to go to sleep.
Sometimes you just need your Mom... I can relate to that.
Today was Davin's first day of school (the second for everyone else;-) and the day went well. For dinner, I took Davin and Bethany to Friendly's to celebrate the first day of school. Davin had a HUGE strawberry milkshake (thanks to his bus driver Leslie who gave him the Friendly's gift card) for dinner. We stopped by Costco and Joann Fabric on the way home. I even made up a special first day of school song and sang it to Davin on the way home. You would think he would be tired and want to go to sleep.
Sometimes you just need your Mom... I can relate to that.
Friday, August 27, 2010
Food Fight
I am in a food fight with Davin. Unfortunately, at the present, he is winning. It is a battle that rears its ugly head from time to time. The first battle with food was before he was 2 years old.
These days Davin is "supposed" to have oatmeal for breakfast. There are very few choices for breakfast since the school gave me a fit and a feeding center changed his whole diet for me:-) Thank you very much to them. Davin ate oatmeal every morning until he was probably 12 or so and then I started giving him cereal! He loved it and I would be careful that it was mushy before he started eating it, but then the diet change....and here we are back at oatmeal for the last 4 years, I guess.
Davin's normal routine is to eat the entire bowl of oatmeal. It gives him a good start and I have found the oatmeal to be an excellent place to stash some things I want to get in him for the day. I can throw in his calcium and vitamin D chewable thing, his flax, butter for more calories and sometimes even a multi-vitamin. Well, he is not too thrilled lately with oatmeal and I can not shove it into his mouth!
Normally, if my kids won't eat what I have for them, I just say fine. No biggie. But, when your kid is 17 and weighs a whopping 65 pounds and some of that has to be attributed to the hardware in his hip;-), you are a little more persistent about eating the calories.
So, we are in a fight. This morning it was a draw. He ate almost half. When school starts, it will be a different story. Do I wait this out or give him the yogurt that he will gladly eat? Yogurt has between 100 and 200 calories and I can not get the extras into that as easily. Definitely not the calcium because that needs to melt for him to be able to eat it.
Did I mention that we went to the neuro yesterday and she thinks Davin is way too thin?? Oi
These days Davin is "supposed" to have oatmeal for breakfast. There are very few choices for breakfast since the school gave me a fit and a feeding center changed his whole diet for me:-) Thank you very much to them. Davin ate oatmeal every morning until he was probably 12 or so and then I started giving him cereal! He loved it and I would be careful that it was mushy before he started eating it, but then the diet change....and here we are back at oatmeal for the last 4 years, I guess.
Davin's normal routine is to eat the entire bowl of oatmeal. It gives him a good start and I have found the oatmeal to be an excellent place to stash some things I want to get in him for the day. I can throw in his calcium and vitamin D chewable thing, his flax, butter for more calories and sometimes even a multi-vitamin. Well, he is not too thrilled lately with oatmeal and I can not shove it into his mouth!
Normally, if my kids won't eat what I have for them, I just say fine. No biggie. But, when your kid is 17 and weighs a whopping 65 pounds and some of that has to be attributed to the hardware in his hip;-), you are a little more persistent about eating the calories.
So, we are in a fight. This morning it was a draw. He ate almost half. When school starts, it will be a different story. Do I wait this out or give him the yogurt that he will gladly eat? Yogurt has between 100 and 200 calories and I can not get the extras into that as easily. Definitely not the calcium because that needs to melt for him to be able to eat it.
Did I mention that we went to the neuro yesterday and she thinks Davin is way too thin?? Oi
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
I Had a Feeling
A mother in front of us in line at the place to get your blood drawn was waiting for her teenage daughter. She had been waiting for a while. She was getting nervous. She finally tried to go in and see what was happening. She came out and said there were 2 people with her. She asked what was going on and was told her daughter would be fine. What did that mean? Find with what?
Davin and I went in to have Davin's blood drawn. We had the same lady. She went over and whispered something to another tech over by the teenage girl who was still not done. I knew I should ask for another tech. This one just didn't seem quite competent. How did I really know that, though? I just hate to hurt people's feelings.
I back Davin's wheelchair up and tell her he has good veins in either arm and ask her if she has a preference for his arms. She asks me if I am going to stretch his arm out and hold it. I tell her that is what I usually do. I stretch his arm out and she grunts. I ask her if that is good or bad. She finally sticks him and has to move the needle around. It is uncomfortable for Davin. I can tell. I just keep telling Davin what a good boy he is and that it is almost over. She doesn't say a word to him. We are on the second of three vials and the tech asks me if his vein usually blows up like that. I tell her no. I have never seen that happen.
Maybe some mothers would not know if the vein usually blows up, but I am always holding Davin's arm, so my head is inches from his little arm. I ask her what it means for it to be blown up. She said that his vein just blew. What??? She is telling me in this voice that is not caring, not concerned, not anything. I ask her what that means. She said it is no big deal. She told me that I am holding his arm tight, so that is going to happen. I ask how it will heal and she said it is not a big deal and it will just heal. She is making me feel like I am being ridiculous. I am not panicked or freaking out, but I would like to know if I should be watching for something or have my doctor look at his arm or anything. To top everything off, as she is continuing to draw his blood, she asks me if I want her to stop. How should I know if she should stop? I told her that she would know better than I would if she needed to stop. I do not know what having a blown vein means!!
The tech goes over and tells the other tech what happened and had her tell me again (but in a much nicer and more thorough way) that it would heal by itself. Our tech tells me that his veins are very small and she used the smallest butterfly needle they have and that , of course, this (his vein blowing out) is going to happen. Hmmm, that is interesting because his veins are much bigger than they used to be and he has his blood taken every six months at least and has for his whole life.
I realize it is not a big deal and that it really was nothing to worry about. I just think I had a right to ask questions about something that happened to my child and I just wanted her to explain to me and maybe to Davin what had happened and maybe in a respectful way that didn't make it seem like I was ridiculous.
Davin and I went in to have Davin's blood drawn. We had the same lady. She went over and whispered something to another tech over by the teenage girl who was still not done. I knew I should ask for another tech. This one just didn't seem quite competent. How did I really know that, though? I just hate to hurt people's feelings.
I back Davin's wheelchair up and tell her he has good veins in either arm and ask her if she has a preference for his arms. She asks me if I am going to stretch his arm out and hold it. I tell her that is what I usually do. I stretch his arm out and she grunts. I ask her if that is good or bad. She finally sticks him and has to move the needle around. It is uncomfortable for Davin. I can tell. I just keep telling Davin what a good boy he is and that it is almost over. She doesn't say a word to him. We are on the second of three vials and the tech asks me if his vein usually blows up like that. I tell her no. I have never seen that happen.
Maybe some mothers would not know if the vein usually blows up, but I am always holding Davin's arm, so my head is inches from his little arm. I ask her what it means for it to be blown up. She said that his vein just blew. What??? She is telling me in this voice that is not caring, not concerned, not anything. I ask her what that means. She said it is no big deal. She told me that I am holding his arm tight, so that is going to happen. I ask how it will heal and she said it is not a big deal and it will just heal. She is making me feel like I am being ridiculous. I am not panicked or freaking out, but I would like to know if I should be watching for something or have my doctor look at his arm or anything. To top everything off, as she is continuing to draw his blood, she asks me if I want her to stop. How should I know if she should stop? I told her that she would know better than I would if she needed to stop. I do not know what having a blown vein means!!
The tech goes over and tells the other tech what happened and had her tell me again (but in a much nicer and more thorough way) that it would heal by itself. Our tech tells me that his veins are very small and she used the smallest butterfly needle they have and that , of course, this (his vein blowing out) is going to happen. Hmmm, that is interesting because his veins are much bigger than they used to be and he has his blood taken every six months at least and has for his whole life.
I realize it is not a big deal and that it really was nothing to worry about. I just think I had a right to ask questions about something that happened to my child and I just wanted her to explain to me and maybe to Davin what had happened and maybe in a respectful way that didn't make it seem like I was ridiculous.
Monday, August 23, 2010
A Reminder
"Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone." Colossians 4:6
I really need to be reminded of this verse over and over and over again.
I really need to be reminded of this verse over and over and over again.
Friday, August 20, 2010
A Sleepover!!!!
In just a few minutes Bethany is coming to pick Davin up for a sleepover!!! She is house sitting for my sister and asked if Davin would like to have a sleepover. Are you kidding?? Of course, he would! Davin doesn't get to go on sleepovers very often, so the thought of it is very exciting for him and for me. I am excited that his sister would think of doing that for him and that he can be excited to go. We have talked about it all afternoon and now we just have to finish up dinner and get a bag packed. Sissy is even going to take him swimming tomorrow:-)
Thursday, August 19, 2010
And Then There Was 1
I knew this day was coming. I certainly prayed my boy back to Wheaton. I rejoiced and cried tears of joy as we watched the Lord provide the seemingly impossible funding that enabled Cheney to go back for his second year. My logical mind knows that is where he is supposed to be and would never stand in the way. But....my Mom's heart is never ready for him to leave.
I was so thrilled to see his excitement at returning to college this year. I see how much growth there has been in him in the past year. I know he is supposed to be far away from home during this time and yet....I was not ready to let him go.
I hugged him at the airport and smiled....but was not ready to send him off.
He knows. He knows he is loved here, wanted here, cherished here, appreciated here, but he also knows he belongs at Wheaton.
I know tomorrow will be better, but today the tears seem to come so quickly. Sometime they catch me by surprise and sometimes I expect them.
This morning as we got ready to leave for the airport, I told Cheney I was pretending he was going to camp. I thought it might help:-) Tomorrow, I am carving a space of his room as my new scrapbook space (until he comes home, of course). I am hopeful that will ease my pain. Probably not, but I will be happy to have a place to work on my scrapbooks. Maybe I will get around to finishing the book for him that was supposed to be done by high school graduation;-)
I am hoping that the pirate flag that now hangs in his room that reads, "The beatings will continue until morale improves", will encourage my creativity;-)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)