Some Good Cheney Days:)

Lately Cheney and I have been having a rough road of it. Nothing terrible, just the normal tugging between a mom and her son who is 17. He is wanting to be a man and be independent and I am a bit concerned with some things in his life. I remember being nervous when Ashleigh only had a year left before college and wanting to instill as many things in her as I could. I am feeling that same way quite a bit lately.

HOWEVER, for the last three days I have had such a wonderful time with my son. We have seen each other alot in these last three days and we have talked alot, too. I am greatly encouraged by what I see in his life. I told Alan last night that it has been a while since I have had such a sweet time with Cheney boy, and it sure is nice. You know the drill. Some days are just tough as a parent. Some days are discouraging and you wonder if they will ever be all they can be. But, some days are great! Some days you see so much of their potential shining through and it does a mom's heart good. I'm really thankful for those rough days so that the good ones shine so brightly.

I have only one year left with Cheney before college. This is such an exciting time. Today we are talking about which colleges he is going to apply to. He has a list of about 6. I am hoping he will start working on the applications soon. He has begun lots of things for school although school has not started yet. I am going to enjoy this year with him.

Watch the new Charlotte's Web?? Absolutely not!!

As many of you know, I am an Awana girl. I love Awana. I think it's a fabulous program. I love serving the Lord through this venue. I generally teach in Sparkies which is K - 2nd graders. Love it, love it. So, the new Awana year is almost here and I was looking through my catalog to get my order ready. I knew they had changed some things and I would need to order some new materials. Did I mention I really like the way Awana has done things??? Okay, anyway, I was looking and looking and found everything I needed, but could not find the teaching materials. Every year I would teach The Green Meadowland Series and they went with the books the kids were working on. They had adorable characters and told a story about the fictional Sparky kids and then a Bible lesson. It had lots of visual flannel graph kind of things and again, I loved it. I could not find anything like that, so I called my friendly Awana operator. I asked if they had anything new for me to teach to go with the new book they came out with. She told me where it was and I looked. It is a little book and there are NO (sigh) visuals and no stories about Grumpella or Stephen. The woman on the phone told me that it is only Bible stories, but also has ideas for me. I explained to her that it is very hard to change. I did keep myself from screaming out that I didn't want them to change it and what in the world happened to Grumpella!!

After I got off the phone, I did the next logical thing. I called my sister and explained this terrible tragedy in my life (I am really exaggerating, but you get the point). She knows how I am about changing things and told me that this would be a perfect time for me to sit down and watch the new Charlotte's Web! I told her that I would never do that because the old one is so good and there was no reason for a new one. I am the same way with Willy Wonka. I do not want to watch the new one. Are you crazy? I asked my sister why people would need to change things when they are really perfectly fine and even excellent the way they are. My sister is not afraid of change and just explained to me that sometimes you need a change:) Oh, Jen!!

So, I have two choices. I can teach the old lessons or move on with the new lessons. Probably because I could vent to my sister, I will be able to move on and teach the new stuff and probably because Awana's materials are so excellent, it will probably be really good. For now, though, I am missing Grumpella.

Oh The Things Neurologists Say...

"He has cerebral palsy...any questions???"

That was my first experience with a pediatric neurologist. When Davin was one day shy of 7 months old, he saw his first neurologist and after checking Davin out and saying, "good, good, good" over and over again, he blurted out the comment above. You can imagine how I left that appointment. Not one of my better days. I was terrified to ever go back to a neurologist. I never made another appointment until my pediatrician or someone insisted that I needed to. For one appointment, I could not even make myself go. I had to make Alan go for me. It was just too hard. The neurologist crushed my world and I just couldn't stand going there and giving him the ability to crush my world again. It took me years to get over this.

Yesterday Davin had a neurologist appointment. I slept well the night before. I wasn't sick to my stomach. I hardly thought about it at all, except to figure out how I would be getting Cheney where he needed to be and how and when Davin could get to therapy. That's pretty cool. God has brought me a LONG way. To think back to the anxiety I had in those first years and then to walk in with no nervousness is a blessing. And to top everything off, the neurologist had some nice words for me. We had been there a while and she was checking Davin out and looked at his belly and saw that he does not have a g-tube. She said, "You really have done a good job with him. You really have."

I have to tell you that hearing those words was much nicer than that first appointment in June of 1993.

In Training

I have been so totally challenged lately concerning my walk with Christ. I feel Him pulling me closer and deeper in my relationship with Him and expecting more of me. (He may have been doing this all along, but I am just now listening.) God began tugging on my heart a while ago and everywhere I go, it seems that I am reminded of my walk and what I can do to be a more devoted follower of my Lord and Savior.

I have been watching Michael Phelps and his swimming. He has spent so much time training. He has been so dedicated and driven to accomplish his goal. As he has gotten farther and farther, his goals became bigger and bigger. What if I do this? What if I go into serious training as a disciple? What if I spend hours and hours every day reading God's word, spending time talking to Him, and listening to what He has for me? What would my walk look like then? I am running a race, so why am I not training harder?


1 Corinthians 9:24-27 says:
Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. they do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.

Big Day for Cheney oh, and I'm Back From Vacation;)

I am back from vacation! Isn't it nice that I could go away for such a looooooong time. Just kidding. We were gone a bit over a week and it was very nice. We really enjoyed Atlanta, GA and I do hope to be able to post some of our pictures, but you know I am not the swiftest at that....

Today was a milestone in Cheney Boy's life. It was a day that he has thought about and hoped for for a long time. He took his driver's test today......and he PASSED!!! I must say that I am hoping I did not show the shock on my face that I felt in my heart when I asked the instructor if he passed and he replied, "yes". It has been interesting to see each of my kids learn to drive and see how some are so natural at it and others are not. I will not say which kid is which. Anyway, we took his test, went to the DMV, got the actual license with the serious as can be face of my son on it, and were done 45 minutes after our appointment. Plus, the test and the DMV are NOT at the same place. I do not know what the DMV has done to streamline things, but every time I go in there lately, I am expecting a few hours like it used to be and they have me in and out in no time. Mad props for the DMV of NJ!!

Let me see, other happenings in our household since I last posted. This may sound awful and lazy, maybe, too, but for the last two weeks I have not had a car because Bethany's is broken and she needs to use mine for her jobs. So, I am "stuck" at home with no way to go anywhere and I have been LOVING it! Davin and I get his exercises done, we get things cleaned in the house which have been left undone for so long because of my busy schedule with working, etc. It has been fabulous. Several days, we took naps just because we could;)

I have always known that I enjoyed being a homemaker, but after a long stint of working and running myself ragged, I am so at peace being at home in my house and working on things and being here when my kids get home from jobs, etc. It is just what I am called to do. Even though my kids are getting pretty old, I so enjoy having dinner ready for them, having a treat made (which I was never having time to do) and listening to them when they wanted to talk. It's pretty cool to listen to your 21 year-old share her dreams and hopes when she gets home from work. It's nice to be able to ask Cheney how his day was and hear him groan when I tell him I am making something he doesn't like for dinner;)...okay not everything can be peachy. I may be of a strange breed that likes to be stuck at home, but I just don't see it that way. I feel so privileged to be home for these weeks and be able to serve my family and rest my mind and body.

Thank you Lord for giving us exactly what we need when we need it.

Vacation!!!

Vacation! I sooo look forward to going on vacation. I love the packing, the dreaming of what we will do when we get there, all of it. However, before you can go on vacation, there are so many things to do that it is hard to fit everything in. We leave tomorrow to head to North Carolina and then onto Atlanta, Georgia. Just a few hours left to get everything done, but I am sure somehow we will get it together before rolling out in the morning.

Ever since Alan started his own business, it seemed we really had an even greater need for taking some time off and getting away. Having your own business means hours and hours of work and sometimes it never leaves your mind. We have had a change in our lives lately, though. A few weeks ago, Alan was offered a job back in the area that he used to work in. He decided to take the job as our lives had gotten very difficult financially and we knew that a different job would make it easier on everyone financially. So, he has been working at the new job for about three weeks. He still has much to do with our business, though, and he is teaching me to take over some things, as well. I wrote a long post about the transition, but haven't been ready to share it yet. It was an emotional time to watch the man I love leave a business that he has nurtured for four and a half years. It had always been Alan's dream to have his own business and it was even better for him to have his family employed and be able to provide for them.

This vacation will be different this year because we only have three children going with us. I keep finding myself thinking about what Ashleigh will want to do when we are away and then I realize she will be here in her little house taking care of her new husband. Just the way things should be.

Have a good week next week everyone!

"Duffers for Davin"

I have had a bit of an absence once again from blogging. This time it was due to a little golf tournament called Duffers for Davin. 7 years ago, our Pastor at the time in NY started a golf tournament to raise money for Davin to go to special therapy that insurance doesn't cover and is very expensive, but very productive. 7 years later, it is still going strong, it is just not in NY, but in NJ. Yesterday was the 7th annual NJ Duffers for Davin and it was a great day! We had over 110 golfers and everyone seemed to have a great time. It is always such a big day for our family and of course, takes a lot of time and dedication to get it put together in the first place. We had a great committee who all worked so hard for the last six months. This golf tournament has provided all of the money for Davin's therapy and this year I am even more thankful than ever before. This year, while watching Davin be still and lose so much muscle mass, I knew that there were the golfers and sponsors that stood behind us and would enable Davin to get the therapy he needs to get back on track. It is truly a humbly experience to have so many people involved in our lives year after year. There are people who faithfully come to the tournament year after year. Thank you everyone!

News Flash! Boys Growing Way Too Fast

Okay, I have been doing pretty good with the fact that I have ADULT daughters. Yes, Ashleigh is now happily married and Bethany just finished up her junior year of college and will soon turn the big 21!!! I still had my little boys to focus on. They still need me for lots of things. There are still lots of school things to do and papers to sign and schedules to figure out. I could feel good about still having my 2 boys at home. I was NOT however ready for what has been happening now. Cheney's school just had their senior class graduation last night. That means that Cheney boy is officially a SENIOR!!! When did this happen? How could this be? To add insult to my injury, I just recently learned that Davin has been in 9th grade ALL year long! I thought we were keeping him in 8th grade this year and somehow that had made me feel much better. He was still in junior high. I still had years to go before he would be graduating. I know you all have your mouths open wondering how I could have missed such a big thing as knowing Davin's grade. I admit that occassionally (and sometimes more often) I miss some details. However, with the kids I am pretty on top of things. Last year at Davin's IEP, we decided to keep Davin in 8th grade for one more year since he can stay in school until he is 21. No one told me that had changed. So, all year I think he's in 8th grade with just really large junior highers. There is no sign that says what grade the classroom is at Davin's school, so I just go on in my little 8th grade bubble. Now here I am, with a senior and 9th grader. I am a bit shocked that this part of Cheney's life is almost completed.

I have to say that I am so thankful to God for allowing me the honor of raising these children. I am thankful for all of the lessons that He has taught me through this child and parent relationship. I have learned so much about his unconditional love and mercy through raising my kids. I am thankful for even the hard parenting moments when I think that nothing is working. I know that God has had those feelings with me. Will she ever learn? Will she ever rest in who she is in me?

I guess it's okay to have older kids. There is always something new to learn and to teach at each stage of their lives.

I Found It!

This is a picture from the Murder Mystery Dinner we did at my church in NY. The Bethany that you all know and love has a lovely look ;) on her face and is all the way to the left and my daughter, Ashleigh is right next to her. They looked so cute with these elephant ears. I don't remember why they were elephants, except that the theme was "circus". The whole concept of this mystery dinner was great. It was based on a Bible character and you tried to figure out who is was. However, in reality it was very confusing and probably the best thing about the night was the costumes and food we ate. It still made for nice memories!

Bethany, while I was looking for this picture, I found MANY more pictures of you, so I will be sharing some of those later!!

Boring Blogger

As much as I love going on my blog and catching up with all of my blogger friends, I am usually at a loss of what to write. That comes as a surprise to me since creative writing was one of my favorite things to do in school. I will have to get a bit more creative!!

Tonight we will go to youth group. Now that Awana is over for the school year, we head back into Wed. nights with the youth group. Boy is it a tough transition for me. Last week went a bit better, but the week before, I was really struggling. Although I enjoy both ages, younger kids is probably more of my comfort zone. The bigger kids can overwhelm me when there are large groups of them. Plus, I am not a "large group" person, so that increases my anxiety of it all. Last week did go better, though, and I am thankful for that.

In the meantime, Alan and I have been praying and praying about some decisions, but the Lord has said WAIT. That is a difficult thing. It seems that we have been waiting for quite a few years now, but God knows. He knows what our needs are and He knows what is best for us. So, we will keep praying and waiting upon Him and His perfect timing. It sure is hard when His timing is so different from mine;) Another lesson...

Busy, Busy Weekend

This holiday weekend was filled with tons of business, and definitely lots of cooking. One of Ashleigh's friends was turning 21 on Saturday, so Ashleigh and her other friend had planned a surprise murder mystery dinner. Alan and I and our siblings and their spouses had done a murder mystery dinner when Ashleigh was little and I think she has very fond memories from that, so it seemed like a great idea to celebrate Rachael's 21 birthday! And it was. We spent much of the day on Saturday cooking lots and lots of lasagna and chicken alfredo. We also made this awesome garlic bread that all of my kids love. We also got out the chocolate fountain that I had bought for Ashleigh's bridal shower and cut up fruit and stuff to dip in it. That is always so yummy!!! The dinner was so much fun, but I am afraid we mostly forgot to eat. There was so much to think about and remember and there were questions that we needed to ask other characters! It was a blast and Ashleigh and Kendra did such a good job thinking of everything. This picture shows me threatening to reveal some secrets that the maid had been keeping...

On Monday we had some of our family over and had a cookout. Memorial Day is such a great time to stop and think about the huge sacrifice made by so many. I am proud that my grandfather, my father-in-law and husband have all served their country in the armed forces.

It was a great weekend, although the Chapmans are on my mind so often. I keep thinking of their huge loss and also how they are ministering to their son. I think having teenage drivers in the house has connected me to that part of the situation. It happens in the blink of an eye. Keep praying for this family.

I hope you all had a great weekend!!

Basement Cleaning is Yucky

My big job for the last couple of weeks has been to get the basement clean and organized. So, today since I am home for the whole day, I am hopeful to get the majority of it done. Bethany has organized all of her part and so I am encouraged that I can do the same. However, I really HATE basements. As a general rule, when we look for a new house, which we have done countless times over the last 23 years, I don't even go into the basement. I just don't like them. I don't want to be in them and I really hate to clean them. But, we live in a pretty small house and need the space in our basement for storage, etc. So, I am off to clean some more after I feed Davin some lunch. That will be a nice break.

Moms

I was riding home from church yesterday and thinking about my Mom since it was Mother's Day. I was thinking of some of the ways that she has inspired my life. I was truly blessed with a great mother. She never made mothering look hard and she always seemed on top of things. I always knew she was a good mom and I have always appreciated the example she set before me.

Five years ago, that was taken to a much different level. Five years ago, last month, my Dad suffered a traumatic brain injury (TBI) and nearly lost his life. By God's grace, his life was spared, but he had to learn EVERYTHING over again. He could not walk by himself, shave, eat, and many of his words got very confused. My Mom became less of a wife and more of a caretaker. I have watched her for five years be exactly what my Dad has needed her to be. Sometimes that was different things and she always rose to the challenge. Did she have discouraging days? Yes, but she continued on. Could she have made different choices that would have made her life easier? Yes, but she didn't. She chose to do what Christ would do and I am so thankful for the example she has been to me.

Things are so much better for my parents now and we rejoice continuously over what God has done for our family. Even five years later, we still see improvements and it is so fun to watch. My Mom has been an incredible example of patience.

Thanks Mom.

What a Week, What a Week

I knew right off the bat that this week would be busy and it has been! On Sunday night, we had our Awards Night for AWANA and I was able to hand out many awards to my adorable Sparkies! They did such a great job and it is always amazing to me how much scripture they can memorize. It was a fun year. On Wednesday, we had our Awana Fun Fair! It was so exciting, but there are many, many details required to get that together and when we finally left the church around 10:30 pm, I was very ready to go home! We did have so much fun, though. Yesterday Davin had an EEG to see if he still has seizure activity since he has not had a seizure for over four years. Praise God! Today I will drop Cheney off, go to PBU and help Bethany pack up her room and move back home from the summer. It is so hard to believe she will finish up her third year of college. Yeah Bethany! We will rush back, unload the car and get Cheney ready for his junior/senior formal (prom) tonight. Whew! (Oh, I almost forgot that in the meantime, Ashleigh will come and get Davin off the bus and pick Cheney up. I am very thankful for helpful kids.) I am a little bit tired from it all, but it has been an exciting week with lots of good things in it.

I have missed all of my blogger friends while I have been absent. I think my busy season is about to end, so I should be back much more often! Martha, Kristina, and Tracy, thank you for visiting me in Facebook land:)

A Biker, A Thesbian, and a Sicky

So, it has been a busy few days. Bethany stayed home from college for a couple of days because she had a virus that had her down. Was she a bit more dramatic than maybe she needed to be? Well, maybe, but how often is she sick? I can give her extra pity once in a while;) Cheney has been busy getting ready for his play. It is two weeks from tomorrow! Yikes! So much to do. They have been working on building the set and getting their lines down. Cheney just loves doing plays, so it is a good busy for him. Davin went to PT on Monday night and we were talking about his dream of having a bike. Davin has wanted a bike since he was about 5 years-old. We have had to wheel him out of more than one store while he cried and cried because he wanted to sit on the bikes a bit longer. So sad. A bike for Davin costs over a thousand dollars which is ridiculous, but what can you do? Anyway, at therapy, they had a bike that kind of worked for Davin. It didn't have enough support for him, but with a few extra hands, it was fabulous! Davin was beside himself the entire time he was riding it. I had to run out to the car and get Cheney so he could see this dream coming true! It was so fun and we left with many smiles on our faces.

In the meantime, Alan and I have been weighing some big decisions and spending time in prayer concerning those things as well. Life changes and moves on and we want to be following the Lord in all that we do.

A Little Road Trip

Davin and I just got back from a little road trip! On Thursday we headed out with some kids from our youth group to check out Cedarville University. Cheney and Alan had already been there, but Davin and I had not seen it, so off we went. (I think it is in the running for colleges that Cheney is considering at this point.) Davin could not have thought the trip was any better! He loved everything about it. He loved the long, long, long car ride. He loved the tours. We also visited Grove City College on the way to Ohio. He loved where we stayed. He just loved everything. It was funny. While we were at Cedarville, I got to visit one little teenager from upstate NY that I used to teach as a Sparky and then later when she was in junior high. That was very nice. We also got to see friends of ours who moved a couple months ago. Fun! It was a long, long ride for a short stay at the college, but I must say it was nice to visit Cedarville. I really appreciated the attitude that I got from the students. Chapel was wonderful and the spiritual energy was wonderful to be around.

Happy Birthday My Friend Martha!

Okay, I know I am copying Martha, but I still wanted to wish my friend Martha a very happy birthday. When I moved to upstate NY, Martha was the first person I met who really reached out to me. I remember having a lengthy phone conversation with her, soon after moving to NY, and finding out that we had many similiarities. We have several children who are close in age and some of our kids remain friends even now that we have not lived in NY for four years. Martha's family has been a blessing to ours many times over the years. It sure meant a lot to me when Martha, Bethany and Josh took the big trip down to NJ for Ashleigh's wedding.

Martha, I hope you have a wonderful day. You have been a wonderful friend to me and I am so thankful for you! (I do wish I had a great picture to put here, but I don't have a scanner at home, so try to picture one of the many glamour shots that our girls took of themselves over the years;)

A Spring Break

This week my Bethany had her spring break. It is so nice to have her home. She is just a bright light in our lives and I always enjoy being around her. Today we are going to make cookies together. We were a mean-cookie-making-machine together when we made about 120 cookies for Ashleigh wedding reception. Today our goal is much smaller, but we will have a nice time being together. I am so thankful for children who have grown into such beautiful people.

Not Much To Say

So I have been MIA quite a bit recently from the blogging world. I do check in from time to time, but to tell the truth, I just haven't had much inspiring to say. I guess there have been lots of things to think about, pray about and read, but not much to blog about.

Alan and my middle kids were away for most of this week on a skiing trip. So, it was just Davin and me at home. We made out just fine, but boy was it quiet. (okay, except for the dogs)

This weekend Cheney will take his SATs which is a big deal to him. After that, we will head over to the Awana Games (formerly the Olympics!) to watch my Sparks team claim a victory???!! It will be a great time, I am sure. The Awana Games are always so much fun. It seems like just a few years ago that my girls and Bethany were practicing the games. They were so serious about it. They had such a good time and even won a couple gold medals along the way. My girls are coaches this year and are as excited as ever. I am hoping their excitement will spread to the girls and everyone will be so pumped up! If I were Martha, I would have one of the pictures of the girls competing to put up, but I don't know how to do that with old pictures. Martha???

Some Deep Stuff

Today we went to a beautiful memorial service for a man that I did not really know. I know his wife, though, and two of his children (daughters) have been in senior high since Alan and I have been sponsors. I am especially close to his youngest daughter. There were several testimonies of what this man meant to so many people. He had many struggles in his life, but God triumphed and this man let that be known to the people he came in contact with. They spoke about what a godly example he was in his business life, his home life and his ministry life. They spoke of the love he had for his children and his wife. They even read the words this man had written when he and his wife had a rededication ceremony quite a few years into their marriage. It left me humbled and thinking. What am I doing that makes a difference? What will I leave behind and am I making the most of my time on earth for Christ? Will I be pointing others to Him? It was a beautiful challenge and I will certainly be praying for this beautiful family as they begin their walk without their father and husband.

As I sat there I could not help but realize that this was in my future as well. If the Lord tarries, either Alan or I will be asked to give the other spouse back to the Lord and begin our walk without each other. It is not a sad story that is only told by a few people, it happens in every marriage. I don't think any other funeral has ever touched me so deeply or made me think so much. Maybe I was more vulnerable to deep thoughts because I have spent a whole week listening to wheezing and moaning, maybe I was more vulnerable because I am a bit older now. Maybe it was different because those children that sat up front saying goodbye to their father were the same ages as three of my children.

Whatever the reason for my deep thoughts, I am thankful. I am thankful for Christians that leave such a huge mark on others and an incredible example for me. I am thankful for the challenge that I received today. I am thankful for the reminder that Alan and I have only a certain amount of time together and I need to take advantage of every day. I am also so thankful to know that this is not the end. Since Christ is my Savior, heaven is my destiny.