Thursday, July 29, 2010

Where Is My Heart?

I feel like I could be at a crossroads and yet part of my heart keeps tugging me back. After doing Awana and youth group for many years, I thought that maybe my time was up, at least for youth group. I had not made many connections with the girls this year as I am usually with Davin during youth group. I had expected that this would happen as I am more of Davin's aide while I am there. That is okay, but I wondered if I should still be there if I am not making progress with the girls. It seemed as if God was leading me away from there. Then, some connections are being made and I am left unsure of how God is leading.

Then, there is this very handsome man who will be living most of his days in Rochester. He doesn't like to live without me and I am thankful for that. If finances work out, we are reconsidering making the move to Rochester for a time. Part of me loves this and part of me doesn't. Both of my girls will be staying here, but I like to support my man and be there to make him dinner and take care of him during the week. He is so good about doing what he has to do to provide for our family and doesn't complain, but I know it would mean a lot to him if Davin and I (and at times Cheney:-) were there. It is not simple, though. We have a house here that, for many reasons that I won't explain, we need to keep. I have been apartment hunting again online and looking at some different areas to figure out if we can do it. So, limbo again. My favorite;-)

I have also been seeing a need and feeling a tug to minister to Moms with young children. I was involved with a MOPS program at my sister's church for a couple of years and I think this may be a ministry that God would have me take on in the near future. But, I must know first if I will be here or there. I know that God will show me what I am to do. I am very thankful and excited about the new connections I am making with the youth group and excited about the possibility of a ministry to young mothers that God seems to be laying on my heart. So many possibilities!


Melanie L said...

This is how it feels to be ready to serve God, jumping at the bit to plunge in and minister to someone, and yet, not being exactly sure what we should do, or where He would have us serve Him. "Ok, God, I'm ready, now what?"

It makes me wonder about how our areas of ministry focus can change. Something can be right for a time, then it's not. Like me going in and out of worship team, or being the Awana secretary for just one year.

I feel that unsettled feeling sometimes - I know I'm not using my gifts to the best of my ability, but I don't know what else to do. Maybe the vacation to the CIA will give clarity. But I do know that God is my best friend, my everything, and He loves me so, so much.

Proverbs 3:5-6: "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight."

Tina said...

Love that verse that Melanie shared!!

Kind of says it all =)

I'll pray that God will lead you right where you need to be

Martha said...

If you should happen to end up in the Rochester area, there is a MOPS group at Living Word in Ontario that is looking for mentor moms.

I sure do wish I knew what will be happening with my mom's house... Will we need to rent it? Where will Dave and Leta live? What will we do with all the furnishings? (I think I am in limbo too...)

Heather said...

Martha, you sure are at a place with many questions in your life, too. I know all of them will be answered, but it must be hard to wait when there are so many people you love involved. I am praying for you, my dear friend.

Thank you for the info about Living Word. I really think I would love doing something like that. Hmmmm....

Bethany said...

Mrs. H, I was also going to tell you about the Mops group at Living Word. I guess my Mom beat you to it. If you moved here, we would be so blessed. I loved spending time with you guys in NJ. Josh did too.. Is Mr. H in Rochester now? You should call me and let me know, so we can have him over for supper again. We like him too, you know. :)

Betsy said...

Ah, that limbo stage! isn't it lovely? haha. I prayed for you as I read this...I hope you find what you need and make wise decisions. ;)

We have MOPS at our church. I was a mentor mom for several years and more recently a guest speaker. It's such a neat ministry!

Christine said...

Yes-- there are so many. Look forward to reading how things unfold.